Mindfulness: Everything Has A Season
What IS MOST Important to you? Your significant other? Your children? Your parents, siblings, friends? Is it your Job/business/career? Your religion? Social Media? Social Time? Or Yourself? One can argue that except for social media, ANY of these things can be interchangeable at certain periods in life and one should not feel guilty when that season comes. There is a season for everything. For my Bible believers, even the “Good Book” says that. BUT sometimes a season can last entirely too long. And that’s where life blurs and gets hard, confusing. Unbearable. And that is why we ALL need a season of rest.
We must embrace ALL seasons at their designated times and places…
I LOVE fall. I mean I love absolutely everything about it. The weather, the clothes, the holidays, festivals, food, and mood. The changing of the leaves. Pumpkin spice and leggings (with my basic ass). It always seems to be a very general calm “no pressure” feel in the air, at least before the holidays start. And although I WISH fall would last forever, It can’t. And it shouldn’t. Celebrating Halloween monthly all year long with the little crumb snatchers, hell no? And THANKSGIVING! It is one of my favorite holidays, but can you imagine Thanksgiving once a month all year round. I don’t' care how much you love them or how close you are. Thanksgiving ONCE A MONTH YEAR-ROUND WITH YOUR FAMILY...I’ll just leave that there. But what would be even worse, Thanksgiving once a month without one.
And although I can’t think of anything else, I would not enjoy about fall year-round, I understand it still needs to remain in its season. If there was no fall, there would be no winter. We wouldn’t have the joys of Christmas and snow (for those evil people who like it). And in turn wouldn’t have the beauty of enjoying spring rains, flowers, that “spring” feeling that closely mimics fall. And then of course no summer. No long summer days/nights, the swimming, picnics, festivals, beach trips. NO school and much easier commutes to work for me. No Hot Girl summer (my millennials and Gen Z’s will get that). We must embrace ALL seasons at their designated times and places. Because I HATE when my fall is shortened by a too long Indian summer or Winter rearing its ugly, cold, dreary head. And I can’t stand when winter stays too long and last well into where I should at least be able to wear my peep toe shoes. I will even admit I hate when fall sticks around until Christmas. It ruins the mood for me. But aside from my selfish reasons, unnatural season shifts effect the planet and everyone on it. Global warming. Unnatural “natural disasters”. But a lot of the issues of these unusual l “season changes” are for reasons we caused. And the same can be said for our personal lives.
We also glorify “busy”, “hustle”, and “grinding”.
Some might believe that I’m judging, unrealistic, and preachy but I’m not. I struggle with this issue myself. PRIORITIZING. Our society has our priorities ALLLLLLLLL the way messed up. No, not every single person in the world. But judging by social media, tv, the news, people I know, meet, MYSELF, etc; We are screwed. Screwing ourselves, our values, way of life, and the ones under 18 who are looking at us and going to take over one day; If we haven’t already destroyed everything. We no longer value rest or reprieve. When and IF we are going on vacation I honestly don’t know if some of us are resting because we are posting every minute of it. Trying to impress everyone around (and in your cyber world) is NOT resting. We truly have NO chill.
We also glorify “busy”, “hustle”, and “grinding”. While Yes, we need to work and work hard...what are you really doing it for? I can’t answer for anyone else and can barely answer for myself. There are days I sit at my desk at my day job or at my computer while I’m writing and just stop and think what is all this for? I mean aside from getting paid so I can live; what purpose am I serving? Every day isn’t going to be some life-changing event but being busy just say you are or for social media sake is not a way to live life. We are inundated with so many words, images, articles, and info, we have no time to sit and just be by ourselves and think for Ourselves. What we want, desire, love. Our spiritual selves are suffering as well. I don’t mean religion, but the core of who we are. We look to the internet for everything we need when we should be looking internally, and for those who accept that way of life, above. And we are receiving the wrong advice, images, and content that is damaging our mental health and wellbeing.
Don’t get me wrong. Social media/internet is a wonderful tool when used for recreation and information. But we have gone beyond that. It is no longer reference or entertainment; it is a way of life and for many of us. It is used as a measure of how to live, eat, shop, and whatever else. I don’t believe it was intended to be this intense and heavy influence on our lives but here we are. And the content we take in shows where our society’s mind is.
When the blog first started, we were putting up content that was pleasing to the palate and the eye. Food, fashion, wine, and beauty. We would get likes, shares, responses, comments, and inboxes. But then we started to add more socially meaningful content. And although it had to do with our experiences as members in this society, it was still not exclusive to one homogenous group. There were things we could learn about each other and have discussions. No matter how hard or raw. But something funny happened. The comments, inboxes, and shares dwindled. Dramatically. We have become so numb to the meaningful that it basically means nothing unless it’s a trend. And keeping up with trends is mentally exhausting whether we all wanted to admit it or not. Because trends can turn you into a chameleon. Confuse your core values, and make you think something is “real” and needed when it really isn’t. That can go for clothes, money, or even a new body.
Some people have managed to keep the internet in its place (mostly Gen Xers and before). But the majority have not. And it shows. I can only speak for the city in which I live but we are failing our youth here. There is a shortage of 400 staff members in our school system and CPS (child protective services) are in major crisis. Now social media and the internet are not the root cause of any of this. However, lack of priorities. Some of the reason for the staff shortage at JCPS is because they are tired of dealing with the disrespectful kids. I am friends and relatives with many in the school system and can attest that to be the truth. But we can’t put it all on the kids. Because most of the behavior problems (if they not medical) come from lack of attention.
And where does EVERYONE’S attention go to these days? I don’t even want to mention it anymore. But aside from the , it goes to everything but what we should prioritizing at the given time. Our families, children, and mental health are suffering. For some, it is chasing a dream that may not be your destiny, but you have abandoned all family and responsibility because social media tells you to hustle. For others it’s chasing a new body, a man or the perfect girl with the right hair or complexion because social media has said you are less without one or a better one. For others, it’s chasing that drink or drug to escape the impossible pressures others, or you have put on yourself due to what you believe social media and society expects of you. We have walked into, out of, delayed, and stopped our own seasons due to what our screens our are telling us. We must stop. The most important season in our lives should be the season of self-reflection and rest. And as a , we are all out of season. We are so busy looking at others “living” in the season THEY WANT US TO SEE than enjoying the processes of our own. We can’t enjoy living the in the moment because we are wishing for someone else's. Not realizing (although some of us older ones should have caught on to this by now) that social media is Not real life. It's Not humility.
We believe that by example is the best way to lead and we are taking the rest of the summer to reflect and step back. First to gather ourselves and live in our season of rest. To live without the influence of media, and truly reflect. We will be bringing content but just a little more sparingly and lighter in fare until this season of rest is over. But don't’ worry. We have NOT and will not abandon our goal of bringing meaningful and needed content and discussion to our blog and other new and exciting ventures ahead. But just like seasons need their time to rest, change, and get ready to bring forth what we all expect, so do we.