Joy Obsolete

Photo: Luke Porter

When is the last time you can say you had “fun”? Like such a good time to the point that you forgot every worry and care you had; Where you lived in the moment. Where you didn’t look at your phone or even remember (or care) to take photos.

Struggle Love, More Common Than You Think: 

Photo: Priscilla Du Prez

But even though we have exposed this behavior, we have had our hand in making it worse. Easier.  Some examples of today’s struggle love are allowing men (or women) to string us along. This texting generation has it BAD. We don’t even have to communicate face to face to have a struggle love relationship or any relationship for that matter. There is no such thing as actual courting anymore. Just WYD, WHTS UP, and a bunch of heart, smiley face, or eggplant emojis (look that one up). It is rare to have a true connection with someone this day in age unless you have already known them for years.

Self-Care: Part II

Image Source: USA TODAY

I like how model Gisele Bundchen described what being “healthy” really is (which I also equate to self-care) “Being healthy is more than clean diet and exercise. It’s about our attitudes, emotions, beliefs, thoughts, and actions. What is our attitude towards life? How are we handling our emotions? Where are we choosing to focus our energy? What are we doing to feel better? Every day is a new day, a new opportunity we have to stop and become more aware. To commit ourselves to do better. What stories are you telling yourselves? Remember, we are the co-creators of our own reality” 

Women: My Body My Choice

These are the people that get to make the decisions for other women. Other women whose lives and situations they know nothing about. Other women they did not even help give life to. Other women they do not know. I am not defending anything based on morals but on that people, humans, WOMEN have the RIGHT to make their OWN choices and live with them!

PART 2 Series: The Dust At Our Own Front Door

Photo: Dominique @nikqo

Many will argue that the above mentioned can and have happened with women (or men) of other races. And that is true and valid. But if we as black women are honest with ourselves; we have done the most harm and had the most harm done by one another. I am a firm believer that those closest to you

Part 1 Series: Expression Has Double Standards

An expression of anger from women of another race or culture is accepted by every living creature on earth. And one can almost guarantee it was due to their “Menstrual Cycle” or she was just having a “Bad Day”. Our emotions are not due to our circumstances or our backgrounds, we just “are” an angry black bitch.

No Empathy Towards Boys or Men

Nevertheless, myths and stereotypes endure and continue to stand in the way of male victims’ recovery. In some ways, male victims face unique challenges, she said. Among them is mainstream society’s misguided belief that boys and young men cannot really be victims when the perpetrator is female.

Nobody Signed A Contract To Give A Sh*t

Studies reveal the average age for a teenage boy or girl to lose their virginity is 14.9 to 16.2 years old. Probably, after a person’s first consensual sexual encounter, many teenagers or adults do not think to themselves next time, I want to talk about it before it happens.

Gen Z...We've Been Waiting For You

The American Dream for us is different because we had no choice. Yes, some of us are selfish, self-serving, thrive on opulence, and live completely beyond our means. But for those of us trying to live the simple American Dream that was taught to us by our parents and grandparents is not easily attainable with regular jobs and income. So we live in online fantasies and create our own worlds however we can.

Must Be The Season of The Vagina

My breaking point began when BBC News posted an article titled, “Blood! Yay! Period Parties are now a thing…” with a subtitle that read "How to throw your very own menstruation celebration". I paused for a moment to ask myself why just why is their so much talk about a body part between my legs and everything that goes on down there needs a celebration.

Instagram Can Make You A Celebrity Overnight

The increase in plastic surgeries for larger sexually pleasing body parts has more than tripled since the 90s. Mainly butts. Now admittedly I was blessed with a little too much up top and bottom so no, I don’t know what it is like to feel body self- conscious in that way. But being a brown-skinned black woman, I DO know what it’s like to never fit into the mold of society’s vision of beauty. This is another topic that deserves its own post. But my point is that the images I had seen through cable, magazines, and music videos since I was a child had greatly impacted me. It ingrained in my psyche that beauty was only in lighter or white skin, and dark and very brown girls must have sex or be overly sexualized to even be considered or loved.